Today I got my first detention ever. And I wasn’t nervous about it I’m nervous to tell my parents but you know what? If they get pissed off, screw them. It was fun. I got to sit there for 20 minutes and did nothing but it have me a chance to think.
I honestly am soooo incredibly happy to have the amount of followers I have. Thank you for sticking with me.
So my sister left. And she took my niece. I broke my promise to my niece. I told her that I would never leave her and that I would always be there for her. I use to come home everyday to see her sweet smiling face and to hear her yelling my name. She was my whole world. Just knowing that I could and would go home to see her made my day brighter when it felt like it was a very bad day. But then one night my whole world came crashing down. That one day I promised my niece, I was watching her because my sister went out to have a girls night with some of her friends and my niece was afraid that her mom would leave her. She was crying and screaming for her mom and I went and sat with her and told her that I would never leave her and she stopped. That day I spent almost all day watching movies and taking naps and eating with her. That was one of the best days of my life. The best day of my life was the day she was born. I waited right outside the door until I was told I could come in and I was the first one except for my sister to hold her. That day I spent all day waiting. At 4:00 P.M. on the dot my gorgeous niece was born. I’ve never felt more proud. It kills me everyday and every night thinking I broke my promise to her. They live over 3,000 miles away and I never talk to my sister. It kills me to know that I’m missing out on my niece growing up.
Ok I agree with what you say but I’m not on here to blog. At first I was only on here to post stuff when I’m upset. Now I’m only really on here to see other peoples blogs. And I’m HORRIBLE when it comes to blogs. So I get it if you guys start in following me.
Ok has anyone ever had someone you love and look up to leave out of the blue? I have it was my sister. She left to chase after some loser guy. She abandon me for him. I need her so much right now and she left me. I hated her when she left. She dropped the bomb on me and my family while we were away without her, it was my grandma’s birthday and we had just had just celebrated my great aunt’s and uncle’s 50th anniversary. I have never seen my dad cry and that night I saw him break down and cry and for that and my mom crying I told myself that I hated my sister and I would never forgive her. But in reality I did. I was guilty that I chewed her ass for almost two hours, it was eight years of anger and hurt feelings, but I said mean and hurtful things. It honestly hurt me way more than it hurt her. I was in shock. I didn’t sleep for almost three days and then when I did sleep for a few hours every night for weeks. Now I still don’t sleep much but I honestly cry myself to sleep a lot. I kinda talk to her but not really. It kills me every day knowing that I can’t see my two year old niece that would scream my name and run up to me and hug me everyday after school and in the morning. And now my whole world came crashing down in that one night. At school I just space and day dream about my sister and my niece. I hate that I can’t watch my niece grow up. It kills me everyday. Wow that’s a lot and very personal. Oh well I needed to vent. 😭